Contest

Maybe you've heard of the microwave weapon they've developed to disperse crowds in a spiffy "non-lethal" manner. Maybe you've also heard that the test group of volunteers who were guinea pigged with this weapon were asked to kindly remove their glasses, watches, and other metal objects first... you know, to give the crowd dispersal scenario a touch of reality.

Okay, here's where you, the reader, comes in: see, the Joint tends to reach kind of a downer group, and I'll bet one of you are just about ready to call it quits. I'll further bet that one of you has a mouth full of braces. For you, we have a contest, and here it is: the first braces-wearing (metal only, please) Joint reader to go to a protest and sneeze or twitch or fart or whatever it is that gives the cops an excuse to do a little pushbutton persuasion in the name of Freedom, and has his/her head explode on camera like a Nazi taking a leak in the Ark Of The Covenant wins a free Dong Resin's Joint coffee mug. Of course, we'll be happy to send that along to the next of kin or police captain of your choice.

White suburban kids only please, we're trying to get media attention, here.